Content Warning: mentions of transphobia, misgendering, willful ignorance, bigotry and mental health.
Scorched Earth
CW: transphobia I’ve been sitting on this post for six weeks, maybe more. It’s been a draft that I’ve ignored, put off, resisted, because it’s hard to write and even harder to write succinctly. I’m not going to rehash the war of the worlds that’s happening in the sex blogging community on Twitter, so if…
My Last #SOSS of 2019
I have been sitting on this post for a couple weeks now, trying to find my words. I have such mixed feelings about posting a favourites list for the end of the year, despite having been included on several published by other bloggers. I am so grateful for their mentions and kind words. I don’t…
IUD Adventures
The following is my personal experience with IUDs (intrauterine devices) over the past 6 years. Like all birth control, what works well for one person may not for another but informed decisions about your body are key. Please feel free to ask questions in the comments and let’s please keep opinions and advice respectful xo…
Looking Back, Going Forward: Blogging Goals of 2019 and 2020
It’s been a big year. Lots of ups and downs, lots of learning, lots of letting go. I have had some sincere heartbreaks and set backs, I have achieved things I didn’t think I ever would. I am tired, and hopeful and ready for the “fresh start” feeling of January, the post-Holidays quiet and the…
Don’t Comfort Me With Lies
On Sunday evening I tweeted a frustration and now that it’s been exorcised from my mind, I’m thinking about it more and I’m even more frustrated. I hold my tongue on the vast majority of things that piss me off in this community because it matters a whole heck of a lot to me and…
A Big Thank You (On The Occasion of My 500th Post!)
I’ve started and re-started this post a dozen times. I’m feeling really some sort of way about 500 entries on this blog and thinking about all of the people who have helped me get here. I want to do my best to mention and thank people, knowing full well I will forget someone or someone…
I can’t be the only one
Content Warning: mental health, abuse in BDSM, women’s mental health represented in media
Deep Space
I try, very hard, to be what you want. I try so hard sometimes I can’t see myself; a shimmering mirage, a glittering lie. I try to make it true, to come together in the shape you crave, to say the words you need to hear to know that this is real. It’s so real…
#SOSS – Sorry, Not Sorry
Every week I feel guilty if I don’t do a post for Share Our Shit Saturday. On weeks that I have my own shit together enough to share my love of other writer’s shit, I still feel guilty. I love the concept of #SOSS and #FF and all the celebratory shout out prompts and memes…
The Healing Power of Ritual
I have always craved ritual, craved it in a deep and significant way, for as long as I can remember. My entirely secular upbringing, by unsentimental ex-catholics, meant that nothing felt sacred, nothing had any pomp or circumstance to it. The idea of imbuing an object or practice with significance or creating ritual was absurd…
Too Shy
I’m too shy. I want you to watch, but I’m too shy. I want to see your slow smile as my hand slips beneath the soft cotton of my panties. I want to make you lick your lips and gnaw at them. I want to make you wait. But I’m too shy. My mind’s eye…
Convention Compersion
I am not well versed in FOMO (the fear of missing out). When I feel it, which is very rare and always very specific, it’s incredibly uncomfortable and hard to deal with. This is the third (fourth?) year that I have shared in the excitement of my fellow sex bloggers as they prepare for their…
Masochism: Not All Pain is Good Pain
{Content Warning: self harm, masochism, abuse. All references are my own and not intended to summarize or speak for any other person’s experiences.} As someone who must actively manage, and have help managing, their mental health, the correlations with kink and sex and want and need, have all been prominent concepts for me for awhile.…
Primal Regression and Submission
If I were to tell someone new to kink and kinky exploration just one thing, one tip, one suggestion to help them on their journey, it would be to keep an open mind. I don’t mean being open minded about new ideas and not yucking others’ yums, that is the price of admission to the…
Setting Blogging Goals and Sticking to Them
Isn’t it interesting how basically everyone on the internet heaved a collective sigh that 2018 was coming to a close? I certainly did; it was one hell of a bumpy ride and one of the hardest years I have ever had professionally and personally. To be honest, the latter half of 2017 was no picnic…