• body image,  Boob Day,  Photos

    #BoobDay – Love Yourself First

    TGIFriday, mothercluckers! I hope you have the hottest, horniest, squirtiest, spurtiest, ooeyest-gooeyest, most toe-curlingly delicious weekend full of whatever it is that gets your rocks off. Finish the wine, order the dessert, stay up, sleep in, just do it, say yes and live and love and enjoy yourself. You deserve it. Love, Violet xx   “If you have the ability to love, love yourself first.” Charles Bukowski  

  • autobiographical,  body image,  Photos,  Sinful Sunday

    Meet Yourself Where You Are

    I’ve received some very cruel feedback about my body in the last two weeks, all anonymous, all online. At first I was mystified that such cold words didn’t affect me more; there certainly was a time when I would have been utterly devastated. What these comments afforded me was the opportunity to look at my body objectively, and what I found currently was a body which, like all other bodies, regardless of size, is constantly in flux. Our bodies are not static. They are ever changing, and forever giving us new and important information. My body does an awful lot for me. Sure, it doesn’t rock climb or run very…

  • body image,  Lingerie Is For Everyone,  Photos

    Maybe Tomorrow

    It’s been a hard week. The kind where you just feel … off. I’ve not felt very sexy or in touch with my body and my new tripod/selfie stick has an absurdly steep learning curve, or maybe it’s just that it’s one of those weeks. I’m keeping my head above water but I’m struggling to write, struggling to fully engage in most things. I know it will pass and I have a loving group of people on Team Violet. So! Instead of spiralling with the frustration of snapping sexy pics for this week and being dismayed by the process or results, I’m sharing an oldie but a goodie. I feel…

  • body image,  Lingerie Is For Everyone,  Photos

    Fabulous in Fishnets

    Part of the impetus to start Lingerie Is For Everyone was to remind myself that even though I can be quite cruel to my body in both word and deed, it is still beautiful and worthy and deserving of decoration. Lingerie is just that for me: a way to celebrate and decorate my body to enhance it’s natural qualities. I’ve always shied away from stockings because I have short, thick legs and I felt a million miles away from the gorgeous Bambi legs that you usually see in stockings. But you know what? Forget that! My legs look fabulous in fishnet! Case in point that lingerie is for everyone who…

  • autobiographical,  body image,  January Jump Start,  Thoughts

    Words Hurt

    Trigger/Content Warning: child abuse, verbal abuse, eating disorders, body dysmorphia I’d like to thank all of you who commented and tweeted kind and healing words in response to my post the other day about my anxiety about doctor visits and body autonomy. It was a hard post to write and share and it’s been interesting since because it’s sort of opened the flood gates, as if by writing that post I was allowing myself to really look at that trauma and see it for what it was: child abuse. I’ve decided to share everything I can remember in terms of how my parents modelled negative relationships with food, fatphobia, ignorance…

  • autobiographical,  body image,  January Jump Start,  Thoughts

    Why I’ll Never Have A Medical Fetish

    I had an appointment yesterday with a new doctor. No cause for alarm, just establishing a connection; we moved last spring and it was time to check that off the ever present to-do list. If you follow me on Twitter you may have seen my tweet seeking good vibes and comforting thoughts because the prospect of being in a doctor’s office invariably panics me. I survived, but not without having a meltdown. My husband took the day off work to go with me, and I’m so glad he did. His pep talk in the car on the way there was sweet reminding me that doctors work for us, and not…

  • body image,  Boob Day,  Photos

    #BoobDay – Velvet Daydreams

    Ooops, I almost forgot it’s Boob Day! Ah, the challenges of getting back into routines, post-Holidays. I’m having a calm, quiet Friday. Lots of writing, which in this case means lots of fantasy. Being snuggled into the couch with a velvety throw blanket and the fireplace crackling makes it easy to slip into the euphoria of fantasy and desire.  

  • body image,  Photos,  Sinful Sunday

    Chance of Flurries

    The sky is filled with snow, not yet fallen, lavender clouds, mission unfulfilled, laden with infinite perfection in countless, tiny stars of ice. I am that snow: soft and silent, falling without memory or hesitation. A flurry of pale desire blankets us and your warm hands begin to thaw my frozen heart. 

  • body image,  Boob Day,  Photos

    BoobDay: Tits and Tennessee Williams’ thoughts on writers

    “…most writers, and most other artists, too, are primarily motivated in their desperate vocation by a desire to find and to separate truth from the complex of lies and evasions they live in, and I think that this impulse is what makes their work not so much a profession as a vocation, a true calling.” – Tennessee Williams Head over to Hy’s site for the full #BoobDay Roundup

  • body image,  Photos,  Sinful Sunday

    The Soft Underbelly

    Some people just bring out the softness in me. He’s one of them. He makes it not as hard to be human. His logic is sound: “How could I trust you if you weren’t fallible?” There’s a tenderness he evokes, a softness that not everyone sees. I am fallible, imperfect, flawed. Vulnerable. I will try to be brave. Check out who else is sinning this week: