getting started

Reading time: 2 minutes

Prompt: Write about the foreplay for a threesome – but in dialogue only.


So I saw a thing on a sex blog that said that the hardest part of a threesome isn’t the interpersonal dynamics, or how it feels afterwards, it’s the getting started.

Okay, professor. I swear, you’re such a sex nerd.

Yes, but I’m your sex nerd. Doesn’t that count for anything?

Stop it! That server is going to see, oh my god that server just saw, shhhhhh! You are so bad! He’s coming back! Save your nerdery for the unicorn!

Don’t call him that!

Call me what? They were out of onion rings so I got you fries.

A unicorn.

A unicorn?

It’s not an insult, it’s a role of … empowerment!

I think when you’re a dude, it just makes you a slut. Whoa, this spicy ketchup has a kick! Seriously. Taste this. What was I saying? Oh yeah: Empowering for women, just horny bullshit for men.

So you’re saying that you’re on the precipice of a threesome with two of the coolest and hottest humans you will ever have the joy of seeing naked, and you just chalk it up to ‘horny bullshit’? That cuts deep.

You can’t even say that to me with a straight face!

Wait, if straight is a requirement I think we are all fucked.

No shit, Sherlock. That’s kind of the point.

Hey!

So are we gonna get out of here and do this, or what?

I’m in, but I want to stop for lube on the way.

Me too. I also need gummy bears.

Is this a fetish I don’t know about?

Don’t ask …

Well, since you asked …

I can’t believe you asked.

Now I’m curious.

So first I take a bag of gummy bears and organize them by colour …

Of course you do.

I’m trying to explain!

This is going to be a long night …. what?! Not in a bad way!


This post is part of January Jumpstart 2023, a community writing project designed to help you get a jumpstart on a new year of writing. Want to join in or get more info?


Violet Fawkes

Violet Fawkes (she/her) is a freelance writer and sex blogger focusing on pleasure education, erotic fiction, and the intersection of identity, kink and mental health.