The term “anal training” might sound a bit intense or draconian, but it’s actually a really common sexual practice. Some folks train themselves to make anal stimulation and penetration easier and more comfortable, others train a partner as part of a kink dynamic.

As with anything, practice makes perfect, so if you are thinking about getting more comfortable with anal penetration, anal training may be for you.   

Okay, but what is anal training?

Anal training is the purposeful and repeated stretching of the anus to increase pleasure and access for anal penetration. It can also be part of a consensual kink dynamic, often where a Dominant partner encourages or requires a submissive partner to undergo said training. If you are a complete beginner, you may wish to start alone before including a partner. For many people the taboo nature of anal makes it more of a solo endeavour due to the worry of it being embarrassing or painful/uncomfortable if done by someone else. Anal may not be for everyone, and that’s totally okay, but anal play can be a very stimulating and fulfilling activity once you get past a few of the common misconceptions and worries. 

Why choose anal training?

In film and media, when anal sex is referenced it is usually without any discussion or disclaimer on what it takes to easily have care-free anal sex. Porn, in particular, makes anal look like a breeze, but anyone who has done it or does it regularly, knows that it’s slightly more involved than your favourite videos makes it look. Simply put, anal penetration requires practice. The thick muscular ring at the opening of the rectum, the anal sphincter, is a formidable gateway to pleasure, but learn how to get through that door and a whole world of sensual delights opens before you. To accomplish this you do need to condition and train yourself. But how?

What you’ll need

Anal training is a task that takes some thought and effort but it is not a lot of work, and luckily, it can be very enjoyable on its own. To begin with you will need a few key elements:

There are many lubes on the market that are aimed at anal play. They tend to be thicker in texture, some are almost paste-like, and are often oil based or silicone based. These heavy duty booty lubes are great but remember: if you’re using a silicone toy, you can’t use a silicone lube, and oil based products breakdown and degrade latex (ie: gloves, dams and condoms). 

Waterbased lube is completely acceptable for anal play, it will simply require reapplication because of it’s tendency to soak into the skin and disappear. The rule of lube is this: if you think you’re using enough, use a little more. The anus and rectum are not self lubricating (like a mouth or a vagina) and they need all the help they can get. 

Anal-safe toys are a must if you want to go beyond the width and length of fingers or if you are working towards more sizable goals. To be considered safe for anal play, a toy must have a flared base to prevent it fully entering your body and must be easily removed. Anal beads, butt plugs and slim dildos with wide bases are great options. 

 Anal training is just that: training – a repeated process over time. That means that gently probing yourself once or twice will not achieve your anal dreams, but returning to the activity and diligently practicing, will. 

How to do it 

Your number one takeaway from this article should be this: do not rush. Give yourself time to explore the sensations and understand what feels good and what makes you pause or hesitate. 

To begin, choose a time that is a few hours after you have used the bathroom. This will help mitigate or eliminate mess. Bear in mind that sometimes butt stuff is messy, and that’s just a fact. Keep some wet wipes on hand and lay down a towel if you are worried. 

Go slow, start small and use lots of lube. Listen to your body. Rushing will only lead to discomfort and frustration. You may find that having an orgasm prior to anal play will make it easier because it helps to loosen up the muscles in the area, making gentle penetration more enjoyable. 

Experiment with different sensations and don’t feel that you need to penetrate with the classic ‘in and out’ movement. Do what feels good and remember that it will take more than one session to get fully comfortable.   

Maintenance, setting goals and charting progress

Like any training program, you may want to chart your progress and have an achievable goal in mind, even if that goal is to simply become more comfortable with anal play or to learn to relax and enjoy the sensations. One way to do this is to jot down a few notes that capture what worked and what didn’t, after each session, so you can see what is best for you over the course of time. Make note of the time of day, how long you spent, what toys/products you used and how it went. 

Levelling up … or not

If you are at all interested in anal play or watch anal-focused porn it can be easy to get pulled into the idea that bigger is better and that the only valid anal play is all about taking huge toys or being able to be penetrated with abandon. Not true! Your ‘anal play journey’ is your own and whether or not you increase the size or intensity, whether you have anal intercourse with another person or keep your sphincter to yourself, is entirely up to you. Go at your own pace and enjoy the process! 

In conclusion

Anal training is a fun and fascinating way to learn about your body, experience pleasure on your own or with a partner, and push yourself to experience something new and exciting. Anal exploration remains taboo in our culture but it is just as valid and acceptable as any other sexual or sensual pleasure. If it’s an interest or curiosity of yours, whether you are working your way towards using bigger toys or experiencing your partner penetrating you, putting in some time and consideration around anal play is worth the time it takes to practice and gain confidence. Don’t deny yourself the satisfaction of a new experience just because it seems a bit out of the ordinary – your body, your rules, always! 



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