Explore. Empower. Enrich.

Explore. Empower. Enrich.

Self empowerment through intimate exploration


I’m Violet Fawkes, and my mission as a pleasure educator is to support your journey of sexual self-discovery. I create sex-positive resources to help you explore, empower, and enrich your life with practical information, wisdom and self-love.

How To: Give Mindblowing BJs
How To: Give Mindblowing BJs
Harlow Comes In 6 NEW Colours
Harlow Comes In 6 NEW Colours
Sex Toy Review: Peg the Patriarchy with Bubbles!
Sex Toy Review: Peg the Patriarchy with Bubbles!
Join Me On Patreon!
Join Me On Patreon!
Read the Newest Blog Posts
Read the Newest Blog Posts

Be Curious, Creative & Courageous

There are five themes to help you navigate as you explore this site, and yourself: Being Sexy, Being Kinky, Being Playful, Being Intimate, and Being Whole. Each section is an ever-growing archive of information meant to support, inspire, and inform you.

Being Sexy

What does it mean to be sexy, and why do we care so much? If you want to explore beauty standards, body politics, and living your sexuality authentically, then you’re in the right place!
Read More "Being Sexy"

Being Kinky

Curious about kink but don’t know where to start? Learn the lingo, get tips for safely navigating a scene, or find a helpful how-to guide. It’s all here for you to explore!
Read More "Being Kinky"

Being Playful

Want to get serious about the fun side of sex? Dive into the world of sex toys and pleasure products to enrich and expand your definitions of pleasure.
Read More "Being Playful"

Being Intimate

No relationship is one-size-fits-all, but this is never more true than when Relationship Anarchy is at play. Learn more about the empowering ways people are expanding their connections and finding new ways to love.
Read More "Being Intimate"

Being Whole

Isn’t it time you fell in love with yourself? Explore your relationship with yourself and your sexuality with self-affirming exercises, tips for self-advocacy and healing, and further resources for sexual health and wellness.
Read More "Being Whole"

I Designed A Dildo!

Since I began writing about sex and reviewing sex toys, nearly seven years ago, I have wanted to design a dildo to share with the world. Now, thanks to a collaboration with Freely Toys, my dildo designing dreams have come true!

Named for one of classic Hollywood’s favourite femme fatales, Harlow represents the intersection of sexual liberation and self-love. With curves in all the right places, the size and design are ideal for beginners and toy-savvy folks. It’s also harness compatible and will make pegging an exciting and sensual adventure. Harlow’s perfect proportions make it a great addition to any toy collection, and you can even customise your Harlow with three densities of silicone and over 20 vibrant colours.

Recent Posts

PATREON | What does sex positivity mean for kids and teens?

Raising your kids to be sex positive does not mean that you're pushing them out into the world too early or that you are promoting them being sexual too soon. Instead, you're giving them information to protect themselves, make their own decisions when appropriate, and keeping you apprised of where they are in their own journey.
Read More "PATREON | What does sex positivity mean for kids and teens?"

Our Evolving Sexual Selves

If something isn't still, it must be in motion; if something isn't static, it must be in flux.
Read More "Our Evolving Sexual Selves"

The Vocabulary of Non Monogamy

One of the most challenging parts about creating discourse regarding non-monogamy, is how broad a subject it is and how nuanced its details are. Part of that challenge comes from language, the more mainstream it becomes as a topic, the more terminology people get exposed to, but that also leaves more room for misinformation and misinterpretation.
Read More "The Vocabulary of Non Monogamy"

Patreon | Non Monogamy Might Be Right For You If …

So how, as a monogamous person, would one become aware that non-monogamy may be a viable choice? As with anything this personal and specific, experiences will vary, but there are some commonalities to be aware of and things to think about before you make any big steps. Non-monogamy might be right for you if…
Read More "Patreon | Non Monogamy Might Be Right For You If …"

Pain Play: My Top 5 Toys

My top 5 toys for pain play all come from Terrible Toyshop. Coincidence? I think not.
Read More "Pain Play: My Top 5 Toys"

Sneak Peak: My Bloody Valentines

Valentines don't have to be cute and pretty ... These dark and delicious designs will drop on RedBubble on Jan 30.
Read More "Sneak Peak: My Bloody Valentines"

Infographic: 5 Signs of Polysaturation

Polysaturation is very real, and nothing to be ashamed of. Learn more about this common and preventable situation with this handy infographic.
Read More "Infographic: 5 Signs of Polysaturation"

Aftercare Mini Guide

Aftercare isn't just for kinky play, it's a great way to connect and prolong the pleasure of intimacy.
Read More "Aftercare Mini Guide"


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