I’m Violet Fawkes, and my mission as a pleasure educator is to support your journey of sexual self-discovery. I create sex-positive resources to help you explore, empower, and enrich your life with practical information, wisdom and self-love.
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Be Curious, Creative & Courageous
There are five themes to help you navigate as you explore this site, and yourself: Being Sexy, Being Kinky, Being Playful, Being Intimate, and Being Whole. Each section is an ever-growing archive of information meant to support, inspire, and inform you.
Being Sexy
What does it mean to be sexy, and why do we care so much? If you want to explore beauty standards, body politics, and living your sexuality authentically, then you’re in the right place!
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Being Kinky
Curious about kink but don’t know where to start? Learn the lingo, get tips for safely navigating a scene, or find a helpful how-to guide. It’s all here for you to explore!
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Being Playful
Want to get serious about the fun side of sex? Dive into the world of sex toys and pleasure products to enrich and expand your definitions of pleasure.
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Being Intimate
No relationship is one-size-fits-all, but this is never more true than when Relationship Anarchy is at play. Learn more about the empowering ways people are expanding their connections and finding new ways to love.
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Being Whole
Isn’t it time you fell in love with yourself? Explore your relationship with yourself and your sexuality with self-affirming exercises, tips for self-advocacy and healing, and further resources for sexual health and wellness.
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Recent Posts
Sexy Valentine’s Day Tips
Spice up your Valentine’s Day with kinky gift ideas and exciting activities. From luxury bondage kits and roleplay adventures to intimate photoshoots and sensory play, discover ways to deepen intimacy and explore fantasies. Celebrate love and passion with these creative, unforgettable suggestions.
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Straight Men and the Struggle With Non Monogamy
This post explores why non-monogamy may feel particularly difficult for cis men and how confronting these challenges can lead to personal growth and healthier, more fulfilling relationships.
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Daddy Issues: Unpacking Trauma and Societal Myths
"Daddy issues" is a term often tossed around as a joke or insult, but it masks deeper emotional wounds tied to absent or unhealthy father figures. This piece explores their origins, cultural stereotypes, and how we can approach the topic with compassion and understanding.
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Sex Positive New Year’s Resolutions
Start the new year with empowering, sex-positive resolutions that prioritize self-love, communication, and pleasure. Discover how embracing self-acceptance, exploring intimacy, and setting healthy boundaries can lead to greater confidence, deeper connections, and a more fulfilling relationship with your sexuality.
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Compersion: The Joy of Loving Without Possession
Compersion is the joy of celebrating your partner’s happiness, even in connections outside your own. Learn how this concept enriches polyamorous and monogamous relationships by fostering trust, empathy, and emotional growth, transforming love into a more abundant and fulfilling experience.
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How to Politely Decline Family Invitations During the Holidays
It's okay to say 'no thanks', even during the high pressure of the holidays.
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Polyamorous Christmas: how to have a holly jolly polycule
Polyamorous Christmas is often a challenge, but finding time with the ones you love, and who they love, is worth the effort!
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Horny for the Holidays
How to keep your intimate and kinky connections burning bright while navigating a busy holiday season.
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‘Twas the Scene Before Christmas
A play on the classic poem.
Baking can get messy ... especially when bondage and rough sex get involved ...
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